Wednesday, October 2, 2013
Cool Mom Coming Through
I'm kidding...I don't care about our government (or lack there of), no, folks, I've been road tripping. For the past two weeks I've put almost 1,500 miles on my car and what do I have to show for it? You guessed it - lots of random posts circling in my head. Here's the first of many thoughts I had while driving on the I-15.
After having a baby I made a promise to myself. I said, "Kate, you are not ever, EVER going to put princess and unicorn stickers all over the windows of your car. You will not listen to nursery rhymes while driving down the road and you will not start driving like a nervous senior citizen just because you have a baby in the back. Stupid people will still be honked at, and maybe flipped off, depending how moronic their driving is, and you will never put a "Baby on Board" sticker on your car, no matter how much money and fame* you are promised." (It was a long promise and a long talk in the mirror.)
Now a year into being a mom, I'm proud to announce I've been able to keep most of these promises: The horn is still my best friend, speed limits have been ignored and no stickers to speak of. I do, however, need to make a confession. I might have sung "The Wheels on The Bus" over and over and over again as I drove from Las Vegas to St. George, Utah. I might have. (Apparently, my baby finds my angelic voice soothing. Or maybe less annoying that AC/DC's "Highway to Hell." Listen, I'm not a doctor.)
Anyway, I might have also cursed the heavens after covering most real and imaginary animals, car parts, human noises and robots, when I couldn't think of any more forsaken things that (insert blah, blah) "...all through the town." Eventually, I found myself singing, "The mom in the car is going insane, going insane, going insane. The mom in the car is going insane all through the towwwnnn." I think it was my best verse yet.
Listen, I'm still a cool mom and just because I rock a little "Wheels on the Bus" and maybe "BINGO" doesn't mean anything. Right? No, seriously, right?
*I acknowledge there's a very slim chance any fame can be awarded for announcing to people a baby is in your car. Announcing you are holding a baby hostage would probably get you more face time. I acknowledge that. Listen, I'm keeping it real.
Hey hit that Top Mommy Blog Icon for me. My absence has caused a massive slide. Tap twice and I might send you a recording of my "Mommy Gonna Knock You Out" songs. It's a gamble worth taking.