I'll admit as a server, I've dropped a few plates and glasses during my illustrious career. However, there's only been two times where I've actually dropped food on a customer. Am I proud of this fact? Absolutely. I mean, I can't even begin to count the amount of plates I have carried to tables. So, if two customers walked out a little dirtier I count that as a victory. So, as I'm sure you are dying to hear, what were those experiences. Well, here's some of my finer moments:
1. Picture a party of 18 people. They have come to our little establishment to celebrate the retirement of one of their co-workers. Prior to lunch, one of the party members pulled me aside and showed me a special cake they had prepared for this day. They then informed me that they wanted the restaurant to cut the cake up in small pieces and then present the cake at a particular time. This didn't sound overly complicated and I took the cake into the bakery area. Fast forward one hour and I'm given the "nod" to bring the cake out. So, I have the pastry chef cut the cake up into individual pieces, recruit my co-workers to help me deliver the pieces and head out into the main dining room. I'm leading the procession, and as the party sees me with the cake, I start to walk in an exaggerated ceremonial way. (If that makes any sense. Picture Simba being presented during Lion King - that's what I was going for.) Anyway, as I go to present the cake to the guest of honor, I somehow trip up and manage to shot put the cake right onto her arm. Yep, picture someone saying, "Good job" while hitting your arm and that's what I did with the cake. "Hey, congrats on retiring, here's a cake on your arm to show our appreciation." I guess it wouldn't have been that bad if one, she wasn't the guest of honor, two, she wasn't wearing a silk shirt that held the icing in place and, three, if my co-workers behind me didn't all erupt into laughter. The only fortunate part was that parties over 6 get a guaranteed 18% gratuity added to their check. So, thanks folks and enjoy the cake.
2. This one actually happened last week and was probably the worst thing I've ever done to someone. Picture, a pregnant woman (that's me) carrying three tubs of ketchup down three stairs. As I hit the third stair the top ketchup tub falls off and hits the ground. Now, here's where it gets bad. As the ketchup tub hits the ground it instantly explodes, and like a torpedo, immediately shoots out onto an innocent woman sitting there buying coffee. If I didn't know it was ketchup I would have thought this woman was shot from behind. Ketchup was all over her dress, up her legs, on her back, in her hair and on her purse. (I'm actually completely convinced that she is still finding ketchup in parts of her body she didn't know existed.) I, with no other recourse than to start crying, grabbed my protruding stomach hoping she would feel some sympathy for my unborn child, but she wasn't feeling very forgiving. As I attempted to wipe off the ketchup she kept muttering things like, "I knew I shouldn't have worn this new dress," "Is this a PETA thing?" "Are you retarded?" "I was just getting cookies for my friends..." Needless to say I replied with, "Huh, new dress? Sorrrryy," "I hate PETA and animals of all kinds" "Yes, I am retarded," and "Our cookies are good..." She finally left and I considered killing myself through drowning in ketchup, but I decided my unborn daughter deserved better.