My first prego picture...
I know I'm new to this game, but I find people ask really stupid questions when you tell them you are pregnant. For example, I've probably been asked about 140 times,"Do you have a feeling what you are having?" Do I have a feeling? Um, if hungry and wanting to rip your face off for asking a stupid question means boy - well then... Do I have a feeling? What is that even supposed to mean? Well, yes, it's a girl because in addition to being a waitress I also dabble in fortune telling and tarot card reading. Did you know that very soon you are going to be hit by a 2005 Honda Accord?
The other question: "Do you have a preference for a boy or girl?" Um, yes, let me curse the baby that is forming in me right now by wishing upon it a certain sex. Do I have a preference? Um, it took me about a thousand needles, tons of peeing on sticks and drugs to get this one - so I'll just take a healthy one.
And then there's the: "What kind of birth are you going to have?" Why do women ask this question of each other? Is there some type of playground bullying going on here? If I answer with absolutely no epidural, in water and absolute silence does this make me a tougher woman? And has it been proven that the child actually feels better coming out as you push in agony? I always say, "Well, hopefully I'll be so drunk the decision will be made for me."
People, for future reference I have no idea what I'm having, no idea what stroller I'm going to buy, no idea when breast feeding will be done and no idea how I'm going to teach them how to read.