Anyway, as I was saying, as soon as the Lexus came out of the wash this
1. What has happened in the past to make you so distrustful of the car wash? Did you once come and realize, once you got home, that instead of drying your car, human feces had been rubbed all over the back? Or did you find out that with "special customers" sometimes car washes insert razor blades into the towels in order to actually scratch the car and not dry it? Or are you just completely paranoid?
2. Was your goal not to actually get your car washed, but to come to some type of business and boss someone around? Was the dentist not listening to you when you kept screaming out, "Re-check that right molar for gingivitis and don't go with that tool, use a bigger Wedelstaedt on anterior for class 3 and 5!"
3. Or has it always been your fantasy to be some scantily dressed woman, soaked in water, sitting on top of a Trans Am for some Warrant music video that drives, no compels, you to pick up wet towels and hum, "She's my cherry pie..." while you go back and forth across the hood of your car?
Is that one a stretch? I felt like I was getting a really good vibe of "yes" on that one.
Alright lady, just take the pen out slowly, and without any of that voodoo magic, just write your answer down.