Thursday, January 8, 2009

Apple, Bronx and Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Walk Into A Bar

As I told my mother, and I will now tell you, I'm not in a panic to have children.  Sure I'll be 30 in three months and I do hear some faint clock in the back of my head, but I'm not to the point of muttering, "baby, baby" while sitting in the corner.  Because no one puts baby in the corner. Yes, I did set myself up for that.  

Anyway, I might not be trying on maternity clothes, but lately I'm getting severely annoyed at all the morons who seem to be having children.  To name a few: Ashlee Simpson.  Bronx.  That's all I'm going to say.  Oh, and good luck with a father who looked like he escaped from hobbit land with his mom's eye liner.  Then there was Bristol Palin who went to prom wearing a corsage and came home pregnant.  I bet she still reads Seventeen magazine while her baby naps.  And lastly, there's Lisa Benot.  Don't know who she is?  Well, good ol' Lisa from The Cosby Show had a new baby on December 15th who she named Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha.  (I would insert a sarcastic comment here, but I think this kid's classmates in a few years will think of a couple of good ones.)

Seriously, all I want is to bring a normal kid into the world.  Well, a kid who will beat up kids like Bronx and (insert random vowel) boy.  Is that too much to ask for?

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