The Myth of the Aircraft

On the way to Vegas there are numerous signs that read: "Speed Enforced by Aircraft." Now, I don't know about you, but I always thought these signs were jokes. Honestly, after seeing one, I always expected to see a follow-up sign that read, "Warning Easter Bunny Crossing," or "Warning over the Hill is the end of the Rainbow and a pot of gold." To me, the mysterious "aircraft" was just a myth...AND THEN...Yesterday, I made the delightful drive from Los Angeles to Salt Lake City. About five miles outside of Vegas, I started to get a little drowsy, so to wake myself up, I started to shake my legs. (This always used to work in college, so I figured it would have the same effect.) However, the only thing that happened was my foot pressed down on the accelerator and off I went. After two seconds of going close to 90, I took my foot off the accelerator and hit the brakes. Fast forward five miles and I'm being pulled over. According to the jack ass, who pulled me over, I was clocked by the "aircraft" at 88 miles an hour. Incredulously, I exclaimed, "What? Are you kidding me? The Aircraft got me?" (I had to restrain myself from using quotation marks while using the word aircraft.) To which he replied, "Yes, mama, the aircraft."

Now, I have received a ticket in the past, which to be honest, was completely warranted. (Between you and me, I still have no idea where he was because I was absolutely flying.) BUT, to receive a ticket by some mysterious aircraft just seems wrong. What's next? I actually receive coal for Christmas because of my love for Hellen Keller jokes? Will I receive a dollar if I yank out a tooth and put it under my pillow?!

So, to all of you beware - The aircraft is above us and watching...and so is some fat guy in the North Pole.