Thursday, August 2, 2012

Childhood Memories of Judo

Oh the Olympics.  I love them.  I honestly do.  I love the bizarre sports, the competition, the drama, the back stories - Which, by the way, how come every Olympic hopeful has had some freaking tragedy in their life?  Is there some correlation here?  So, if I take up cocaine and beat my child, is there a better chance she'll win an Olympic medal in fencing?  It's something to consider.

Anyway, this morning, while eating my pancakes (that's my current diet because I need to put on some L.B.s and we don't have a refrigerator anymore) I stumbled upon the Women's Judo Final.  Now, as you all know, because I'm sure the demographic that follows this blog ALSO follows Judo, Amercia's Kayla Harrison was able to win its first gold medal in this event.  This feat, apparently, was quite amazing, but I got to be honest, I'm not really clear on the whole "sport aspect" of Judo.  Basically, from what I could gather, this sport consists of attempting to grab your opponent's shoulder and then, once you grab hold, you fight to bring them to the floor.  Once they are on the floor you jump on top of them and hold them there.  Now I'm not entirely sure what the sitting on them accomplishes because there's no pinning involved like wrestling, but they kept doing it and finally after ten seconds they would be waved off. 

So, there you have it: Judo 101.  But, folks let's be honest.  Is this really a sport?  I mean, isn't this basically what every older brother does to their younger sister?  Honestly, while I was watching the match I kept having flashbacks of my brother entering my room, with a look of fury, grabbing my shoulders and then throwing my to the ground.  And then, just when I thought the torture was over, he would proceed to jump on top of me and then, either dangle a drip of spit over my quivering face or threaten to fart.  (I now sort of wonder if the same thing happened during the Olympic match I watched.  I wonder if Kayla went with the classic coughing noise that let's her opponent know she's conjuring up some good phlegm, or if she whispered, "I had lots of beans last better watch out.) 

At any rate, the jury is still out for me in regards to Judo - is it a sport or just a good ol' brawl between siblings? 

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