Not actual picture...but pretty close.
So, I have these regulars, who spend the majority of their meal doing three things: 1. Subtly sexually harassing me 2. Accusing me of not giving them enough bacon strips even though in the history of our restaurant we have always given TWO FREAKING PIECES and 3. Informing me that the rest of my co-workers are either idiots or "not good looking enough to work here."
After many meals of enduring their ridiculous banter I decided to fight back. The following took place...you tell me who won this round.
Meat Head #1: Kate, are you married? (This question has been asked before and is usually followed up with a fake proposal for a life of money and love.)
Kate: Um, yeah, five years. It's actually gotten pretty serious.
Meat Head #2: Do you ever cheat?
Kate: No. But, funny you would ask because the other day I saw Nicole in here (Meat Head #3's wife) and she was with some hot guy and all she kept saying is what an idiot Travis is and what a terrible husband he is.
Meat Head #3: That sounds about right since we are getting divorced.
Meat Head #1, #2: We'll take the check.
I know I should feel bad, but....