Giving Things Away

So, today I had to serve this rather annoying chick on the patio. How annoying? Well, she was one of those people, that when I picked up her empty plates and asked, not really intending a real answer, "How was everything?" she replied, "Well, I loved the bacon, but I didn't totally enjoy the eggs, and the rice and beans didn't seem fully cooked." Thanks food critic because I really wanted a rundown of your breakfast.

Anyway, after a lengthy complaint about the lack of internet, she paid her bill and I went inside to clean some tables. As I looked out the window, I saw her take our water bottle, which is sort of this cool slender glass bottle, and place it in her bag and prepare to leave. Immediately, I walked outside and stopped her from leaving. As I approached her, I asked, "Did you take our water bottle?" (This time intending a real answer.) And she replied, "Um, yeah isn't that okay?" (Yeah, because all restaurants allow you to take home plates, forks and glasses after your meal.) And I said, "Not really," and she said, while handing me the bottle, "Oh, because last time I was here they just gave me the bottle." To which I responded with, "That's just weird," but what I really meant was: Gave you the bottle? Really? Do you also go to Macy's and they just "give you" clothes? Or do you find yourself at Target trying to stop all the employees from "giving you" merchandise?

Honestly, people are so weird. I hope she comes back in so I can take her laptop. I mean, I hope she comes back in so she can "give" me her laptop.