Thursday, February 6, 2014

Can Anything For Our Kids Be Trusted?

I've commented in the past about idiotic children books and their pointless stories, but it's now time to discuss children videos.  (Spoiler Alert: I'm a terrible mom, who let's her 17 month old baby watch videos!  I know, I know, I'm already planning on autism, ADD and developmental issues.)  Anyway, the other day, while we were driving around judging the prices of homes listed for sale, we put on some forsaken Elmo video to occupy our child.  I don't exactly understand the attraction to Elmo, but holy moth to a flame.  As soon as the video goes on our child will go from a babbling, happy child to zombie, drugged baby.  (Oh, wait is this why they don't want you to show videos to your child?)  Anyway, on the video is some character named Mr. Noodle.  I, fortunately, have never seen what this character looks like, but I've heard from the front seat that this guy is a complete moron.  Everyone, from Elmo to the kids, who will be denying its them in an Elmo show in a few years, hate on Mr. Noodle during the entire video.  Seriously, Elmo will be like, "Hey let's read a book," and then a few minutes later you'll hear, "No, Mr. Noodle, you don't eat a book.  No, Mr. Noodle, don't sit on the book."  After listening to the video for a little while I started wondering why Sesame Street, a company that prides themselves on educating kids, would create a character that seems to be only a notch above a severely mentally damaged person, and then place him in situations, where kids and other puppets yell at him for his stupidity?  Are they trying to teach kids the very important skill of bullying?  Because if so, bravo Sesame Street - after listening to this video twice, I was ready to do some pretty terrible things to Mr. Noodle.

And now let's discuss the show Doc McStuffins.  Oh, Doc McStuffins.  Listen, I'll be honest, this one isn't that bad.  I mean, sure one day Doc will have to be admitted to some pysch ward because her parents will finally realize she's been suffering from acute hallucinations involving talking stuffed animals, but hey, isn't it cute right now?  No, my problem with this show is the character Lambie, who's whole mission in life is to offer creepy cuddles to anything that moves.  Honestly, give her a trench coat and an apartment overlooking a children's playground and she will be registered within the week.  Seriously, it's just weird.  And the timing of her cuddles are so weird.  Some toy will receive a pretty bad diagnosis from Doc, with no solution in sight, and then Lambie will saunter over and ask, "Do you need a cuddle?"  No, Lambie.  Geez, give the toy some space.  It would be like hearing you have cancer, and then some creepy male nurse coming in saying, "Hey guy, heard you got the cancer, how about a hug?"  Um, no.

So, I'm at a lost.  Books are full of ridiculous characters.  Videos are full of morons.  Are we supposed to be talking to our kids or something?

1 comment:

JoAnn said...

I always wonder why a character like Elmo has a speech impediment? Come on, they could not find someone to speak correctly???