Awkward #3: (refer to the last two entries)
Homeless man walks down four blocks and scratches every car with a pocket knife. Finally, at the fourth block the police catch up with him and he is arrested.
It is estimated that almost twenty cars were scratched. His last victim was a nice Lexus.
I walk into the restaurant, after getting the story from the police officer, and say out loud, as I'm pointing to the street, "Man, I would hate to own that Lexus."
Three tables over a customer pops his head up and says, "What did you say about my Lexus?"