Wednesday, August 27, 2014
Does This Award Make Me Look Amazing?
By the last day, I started seeing some improvement and was glad I had done the camp....blah, blah, blah. (To protect myself from any defamation charges.) Anyway, at the end of the camp we had an awards ceremony. Each coach was allowed to pick one camper from each level who they deemed "Most Improved," "Or Greatest Hustler" etc. (Basically, the best overall camper.) I chose a small girl, probably only 5"1, because she hustled a ton and seemed to take instruction well. So, I made a little speech about her, clapped my hands, and I think, gave her a pair of shorts. (Big, big, big time prize.)
Anyway, as we were cleaning up and preparing to leave the camp, my "Best Overall Camper" came up to me to tell me thanks for the award. I followed up with more encouragement and a nice pat on the back, to reinforce my belief in her and my desire for her to go home so I could do the same, when all of the sudden she asked, "Now you went to Duke right?" Yes, I said. And then she said, "Cool. I really want to go to Duke. Do you think you could contact the coach?"
Wait a second. What? You just got a pair of shorts for being, let's be honest, "The Not As Bad As These Other Kids, But Really, It Was A Very Close Call." After I composed myself, and hopefully wiped off the, "What the..." look off my face, I said, "Yeah, Duke...awesome. Totally. Um, tell me your email address. I'm really good at remembering stuff." To which she rattled off something that went like this: email@example.com. Totally got it locked down.
As she walked away triumphantly, I started to laugh. I have never seen an award go faster to someone's head than this time. I don't think even Heisman Winners take the trophy and then scream out, "What NFL Team wants me now??!!!"
How do I start my email to my coach....Dear Kerstin, A few weeks ago I coached a semi-athletic girl, with giant ovaries of confidence...her email address is...oh crap...